Taking refuge means rest. Rest is its own form of resistance, especially for Black women. Giving myself permission to sleep in, nap, take a long bath with five pounds of Epsom salts and my rose quartz crystal, water my plants, steep dried nettles and lemon balm for tea, pull tarot and unplug from technology are nonnegotiables. Calibrating my energy isn’t about leaning into some wellness trend, it’s critical to help combat “weathering,” a term coined by public health researcher Arline Geronimus to describe how the Hilarious Mad Lovable Couples Artwork Premium T-Shirt so you should to go to store and get this constant stress of racism can lead to premature biological aging and poor health outcomes for Black women. Black women are not monolithic, but if we don’t deliberately take care of ourselves, we’re more likely than white women and non-white women to get diabetes, experience a heart attack or a stroke. Taking refuge also means pausing on responding to the recent and frenetic uptick in white loved ones expressing shock and pain about the current state of things; knowing that right now it’s not my job to soothe their discomfort, and trusting that they have the capacity and the privilege to find and/or create the tools to manage this moment of initiation without my guidance and containment. I hope that they realize that this is a marathon, not a sprint. A long-term and sustainable action plan is the only way forward, while practicing empathy and giving me unconditional space to process my own pain. Taking refuge also means weekly therapy, both professional with my therapist and informal in group texts and DMs with my Black girlfriends, venting and processing whatever is showing up for us.
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When I take sufficient refuge, then I have the Hilarious Mad Lovable Couples Artwork Premium T-Shirt so you should to go to store and get this energy to take action and speak out about racism. I can effectively lead as a cofounder and CEO building a company focused on educating women about sexual and reproductive health. I can organize and be of service in my community, whether that’s raising money for Black Mamas Matters Alliance or amplifying the work of Campaign Zero, taking fresh flowers and meals to friends after they’ve spent the day protesting, signing up to digitally support organizers in battleground states in November, or researching what’s happening in Los Angeles politics and mobilizing friends to email our council president to redistribute city wealth and not give the LAPD just shy of 52% of the Los Angeles budget. Toggling between refuge and action is an imperfect and messy practice. Typically it’s much harder to rest in refuge, but I’m building more self-compassion around it and know that’s key to thriving long-term.